Reflections on my son's wedding

Paula's Retirement

Reflections on my son's wedding

The wedding is behind us; in fact, it has been three weeks since this major life event took place. I still can't believe my mischievious little redheaded boy is married! Life really does happen fast. He and Misty are getting settled into married life and seem to enjoy it immensely. Our house is quiet again - back to the empty nest. He had spent the last seven months at home after his lease ran out so he could save money for the wedding. It was great having him back those few months. We were really able to relate as adults during that time. There was very little conflict compared to what we had during his teenage years. I will always consider that time as God's gift to me - a chance to redeem myself in my son's eyes and as a mother. Though I miss him now, we were without him for seven years so this is nothing new.

The wedding was simple, sweet, joyful, and beautiful, as I had prayed so hard it would be. After months of planning, I consider it a real success. Since Sean and Misty are both 28 years old, they took almost full responsiblity for planning it and bore a great deal of the expense as well. I was impressed with their handling of things. They didn't break the bank or go into debt. Weddings are entirely too expensive these days, but we came in well under the national average of twenty to twenty-five thousand!

I read somewhere that the mother of the groom is responsible for showing up and wearing beige. Well, I did more than show up, and with my silver hair, I wasn't about to wear beige! Of course, I planned the rehearsal dinner, a casual catered barbecue. That meant finding a location, arranging for the caterer, decorating the tables, making the placecards and invitations on the computer, sending out the invitations, ordering the flowers, planning the seating arrangement, and lining up the showing of the memory DVD. It was fun, and the food was good.

I also worked hard to get me ready. That meant time and money spent to find just the right dress with matching shoes and jewelry. I spent too much, of course, in the effort to look as young and pretty as I could at my age. My dad reminded me that no one would care how I looked. Everyone would be looking at the bride. He was pretty much right, of course, the wedding IS all about the bride, but I knew my friends would be looking at me, and I wanted to look my best. So there was the fifty dollar haircut, a trip to the dermatologist, Weight Watchers, and jazzercise classes four times a week. I guess the result was pretty good. I did lose weight, and I got lots of complements, but then people always complement the mothers at weddings.

The wedding director said that three things have to go wrong at every event. I guess our three would be that my sister's mike didn't work when she sang during the ceremony, my husband who was also the best man forgot and escorted me out before the flower girls and ring bearer went out, and a dividing wall fell at the reception. Fortunately, my sister has a very loud voice and most people were able to hear her. No one but me and Doug seemed to notice we were out of order leaving the ceremony, and the wall was caught before it crashed onto the big screen TV that showed the memory DVD. In other words, there were minor glitches but no major disasters. For that I am very thankful.

Looking back, I would say that my favorite things about the wedding were seeing the the memory DVD, enjoying the pictures afterward, greeting lots of family and friends, hearing the mother of the bride sing for her daughter's wedding, and seeing my son do so well as he stood up to say his vows. Of course the very best thing of all was seeing the love and joy on my son's and daughter-in-law's faces that whole day. I thought I would be nervous when the day arrived, but I wasn't. I was excited and happy and enjoyed the whole day from start to finish. I ended the day thanking God for hearing and answering all my prayers.